Posts Tagged ‘Hospital Humor’

Blue Flue? Hospital Humor

October 28, 2013

Feelin Blue

They say whatever doesn’t kill you makes you stronger.  I guess that can be true in a hospital too.  Okay, I know they can’t always be jewels but I did post a comic…even if it was late.  Hopefully I will have an update and some pictures on the I’ve Been Thinkin’ site tomorrow at http://bolumpkin.wordpress.com

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Hospital Humor- It Can Get Worse

October 10, 2013

It Will Be Worse

Now that the “Affordable Health Care Act” has gone into effect most of the people that I have talked to who tried to get it are having trouble getting on line.  Those that have got online have found that they can’t afford the “Affordable Health Care” that is available to them.

Over the years I have spent a large portion of my income on insurance and hospital bills.  I really hope that the government never gets to the point where they decide who is worthy of getting treatment.  I am afraid the cost of my upkeep would cause them to just write me off.  I only have about another year and a half left on the battery on my pacemaker-defibrillator  and the cost of replacement is about $60,000.  I am afraid a committee of bureaucrats would decide to just let my batteries run out…after all if they don’t think the government is worth keeping open why would they want to keep me running.

Y’all have a great weekend and I will post again Monday,

Say What!!!? Hospital Humor

September 25, 2013

Say What

Sometimes I think it might be better if they would just put you to sleep and do what they have to do than to tell you what they are going to do in advance.  I have been inspected, injected, neglected, and almost infected so many times that I can handle almost anything but there are some things I would rather not know in advance.

Some people are scared of needles.  It is the tubes that scare me.  I once had a tube run up the artery in my leg (groin area) to my heart that was about the size of my finger.  It was hooked to a machine that was actually an artificial heart that did the work for my heart so it could rest.  I have had tubes in my chest and between my ribs to drain fluid etc.  Removing those tubes is almost always very painful and never pleasant.  When they come at me with a needle I just smile.  When they come at me with a tube it scares the daylights out of me.

Hospital Food

September 18, 2013

That's Why They Call It Hospital Food

The last time I was in the hospital they brought me baked or broiled fish every night.   I didn’t get food poisoning because I didn’t eat it.  I sent my family downstairs for fruit and salads.  Someone from food services finally came by to see what I would like to eat and I told them anything but broiled or baked fish.  I know that broiled fish is probably better for you but if I want fish I want it fried and preferable some kind of fish I am familiar with like bream or catfish.

I am having connection problems and I hope I am able to load the rest of my comics this week.  They are ready but my MiFi is terribly slow and after waiting forever sometimes I lose the connection.  Hopefully Mildred and Edna will be making a connection tomorrow.

Medical Specialist- Hospital Humor

September 4, 2013

Special Treatment

I sometimes wonder if the entire Health Care Industry is not conspiring against us.

Medical Terms

August 27, 2013

Medical Terms

I usually hate it when Doctors use a bunch of medical terms that I don’t understand but I think I would be a little nervous if they couldn’t think of the name of what they were workin’ on.

It seems like I’m havin’ more trouble than usual tryin’ to post stuff tonight.  My connection is slow and Molly (my wiener dog) just almost chewed my power cord to my computer in two.  I caught her just before she finished one side of the wire.  I hate to think of what would have happened to her if she had chewed through both sides.  I can’t help but think of the cat on Christmas  Vacation.  I love her dearly but I will be glad when she gets out of the stage for chewing up everything.

It kind of scared me and I don’t need to get too scared because it is not good for that thingamagig that pumps my blood.

Last Laugh- Hospital Humor

August 21, 2013

Last Laugh

One of the best remarks I have ever heard of on a tombstone was “See, I told you I was sick.”

I usually have a KRUD-TV on Wednesday but I didn’t have one for today.  I will try to catch up on them this week.  I am trying to keep my buffer stocked and still produce good comics.

I have some ideas in my head and just have to take time to put them into the computer.  Well, you are halfway through the week and we are quickly using up August.  Make sure you try to get all the good you can out of the rest of both of them.

Favorite Disease

August 15, 2013

FAVORITE

Sometimes I think Doctors are a little too eager for you to be real sick just so they can see if they can make you better.

About 17 years ago a Doctor really insisted that I needed a heart transplant and that if I didn’t get one I would probably never leave the hospital.  I refused the transplant anyway.  I’m still here though.  The funny thing about it was that while I was still in the hospital I noticed TV people everywhere and when I asked about it I was told they were there to do a news story on Dr..un-named’s 50th heart transplant.  Gee…if I had opted for the transplant I could have been on the news.

I think the fact that I am still kickin’ (though not very high) is a much better news story.

Group Insurance

August 6, 2013

Group Insurance

This sounds like some of the policies I have had in the past.

Hospital Humor is appropriate for today.  I am going to my cardiologist for a stress test today and I haven’t had to walk on a treadmill in years.  They usually just chemically stress me and shoot me up with nuclear medicine but the doctor wants to see what happens when I actually do any physical activity.  I guess it makes sense because normally I don’t look sick.  Most people would never guess that I have heart problems at all and when the doctor sees me I am rested and usually doing fine.

I am sure all will go well because if I feel like they are pushing me too hard I will stop on my own.  My wife has already instructed me that I don’t have to prove anything.

Yall come back tomorrow for a new KRUD_TV.  Thanks for your continued support.

Hospital Humor- Final Results

July 19, 2013

Final Results

One thing I have found out is that doctors don’t always agree.  I usually like to stick with the one who has the most optimistic outlook for my condition.  Most likely there won’t be an autopsy anyway.  They will just assume that my ticker finally quit.

I hope to have a new KRUD-TV comic next week.  I am working on some now.  I also hope to have some more Hank The Handy Man comics colored and ready to post by next week at http://bolumpkin.wordpress.com  In any case I have posted on both sites this week as well as posting devotionals for my church at http://shilohbaptist.blogspot.com/ .

I hope you all have a great weekend.  My grandson is getting married this Saturday so I will be busy.